The Wizard of Odd
by Sapphire Skye
Summary: Chapter 7: The Death of Relena is up! What happens win Gundam Wing meets The Wizard of Oz? (rated PG for mild insanity) *NOW COMPLETE*
1. Introduction!

I do NOT own Gundam Wing, The Wizard of Oz, or the people in this story besides Sapphire Skye. I also do not own Sanny, as I have so lovingly nicknamed my sanity. He has now left me and is sitting on a beach in Jamaica with my common sense drinking margaritas until dawn.  
  
Sapphire clicked off the TV as the movie ended.  
  
Wufei: Why did we watch the Wizard of Oz?  
  
Sapphire: Because I wanted to!  
  
Duo: How come they spent all that time trying to reach Oz, and we're trying to destroy it?  
  
Everyone: *looks around, thinking*  
  
Heero: Because that's a movie, and this is real life (hehe), you brainless baka.  
  
Duo: Fine, fine.  
  
Sapphire: Well, I'm pretty tired, I'm going to head off to bed, you guys.  
  
Sapphire walks to her room and goes to sleep. She starts to dream.  
  
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Yes, I know, tis a very short chapter. But I don't want any of the story in the chapter called INTRODUCTION! That would defeat the purpose of INTRODUCTION! Anyways, please R&R and read more and R&R more, and then read again and R&R again. Or if you'd like, you can just read it once. This seems to be more popular. ANYWAYS! Please review or…or…or I'll…hmm…Or I will send Chibi-Quatre after you! *Scratches head* I need some big ferocious beast to send after you non-reviewers. *Whistles and a huge muscular man walks up* This is Hans. If I don't get reviews…we will send Hans. You do not want us to send Hans. *Walks off, while Hans cracks his knuckles* 


	2. Munchkins and Chibis!

Disclaimer: I don't own GW, Wizard of OZ, or anyone besides Sapphire Skye. I also do not own a computer faster than a fat man after lunch. I would like one. At least a skinny man after lunch. Give me yours.  
  
  
  
Sapphire woke up in a building she didn't recognize.  
  
Sapphire: I am in a building I do not recognize.  
  
I just said that, you baka.  
  
Sapphire: Oh, sorry!  
  
She walked out to find herself in a very strange place. When she was looking around, Chibi-Wufei ran up to her. Followed by hundreds more Chibi- Wufeis.  
  
Chibi-Wufei, #194: Hello, you are in Chibi-Wufei land! Your house landed on the Wicked Witch of the East! YOU'RE OUR HERO! *Glomps her*  
  
Sapphire: *shakes him off* Ah, okay.  
  
Chibi-Wufei, #342: *Sings* We welcome you to…HEY WAIT A MINUTE! You're an ONNA. We don't welcome you anywhere.  
  
Sapphire: You're a Chibi-Wufei alright.  
  
Chibi-Wufei, #666: I AM SATAN!  
  
Chibi-Wufei, #245: You'll have to forgive him. He's always been an odd one.  
  
Sapphire: Right…  
  
Demonika: *floats down in a bubble wearing white and fairy wings, holding a wand* Sapphire, you are going to DIE for this.  
  
Chibi-Wufei, #585: More Onnas! *gets hit by lightning*  
  
Sapphire: *Points and laughs at Demon* You…YOU'RE THE GOOD WITCH OF THE NORTH?  
  
Demonika: Shut up… ANYWAYS! You want to get home, all you have to do is go the Wizards of Odd.  
  
Sapphire: I thought it was the Wizard of OZ  
  
Demonika: Trust me…Wizard of ODD fits a lot better. Ahh, let's see. *Pulls out some notecards* To help you on you quest…yada yada yada…Diamond Sneakers!  
  
Sapphire: I thought it was Ruby Red Slippers.  
  
Demonika: You wanna walk all the way from here to there in HIGH HEELS?  
  
Sapphire: Er…no, no really.  
  
Demonika: That's what I thought. Now…CHIBI-WUFEIS!  
  
Chibi-Wufeis: Yes, Baka Onna, Ma'am!  
  
Demonika: *narrows her eyes into a glare* How does Sapphire get her butt outta here?  
  
Chibi-Wufei, #93: Like we'd tell you!  
  
Suddenly pink smoke starts rising from a hole in the ground and Relena pops out  
  
Relena: Hey! Okay, my sister's dead or whatever, house fell on her, now gimme her shoes! *She sees them on Sapphire's feet* HEY! My shoes!  
  
The Chibi-Wufeis push her back into the hole.  
  
Relena: *voice fading* I'll get you, my pretty…WAIT! I'm the prettyyyyyy!  
  
Demonika: Well, she's going to try to kill you then.  
  
Sapphire: That's okay, I have the ultimate weapon.  
  
Demonika: Alllll right.  
  
Sapphire: Hey, where's Toto?  
  
Demonika: Do you have a dog?  
  
Sapphire: Yeah, my black lab, Charcy.  
  
Demonika: Black lab… oy vey. *She snaps and the dog is with her*  
  
Sapphire: CHARCY! *hug the dog*  
  
Demonika: Anyways, how does she get out of here?  
  
Chibi-Wufei, #714: Follow the Mellow Thick Toad  
  
Sapphire: What?  
  
Chibi-Wufei, #472: *Points to a really fat toad standing by a dirt path* He goes to Odd every now and then.  
  
Sapphire: *leans over to talk to the Toad* Can you take me to Odd?  
  
Toad: Whatever.  
  
Sapphire: And I don't have any money, so I can't pay you.  
  
Toad: Whatever.  
  
Sapphire: And Charcy may just pee on you every so often  
  
Toad: Whatever.  
  
Sapphire: He really IS a Mellow Thick Toad. Well, I'm off!  
  
Demonika: Hmph…in more ways than one.  
  
So off goes Sapphire on her journey to Odd, while Demonika personally beats the crap out of every single Chibi-Wufei.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Well, that's that. What'd you think? Well, anyways R&R and stay tuned for the next exciting(ly stupid) chapter! Don't forget about Hans! Show them what you did to the last person who read without reviewing. Oh wait… too gruesome…sorry! *walks off whistling while Hans chuckles evilly* 


	3. The Scarecrow named Trowa!

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, The Wizard of Oz, or anyone besides Sapphire Skye, who I may not own for too much longer because It's-Obvious- That-Isn't-A-Real-Name, Inc. is suing me for the price of 6 Jillion dollars. Anyways, I also do not own Pepsi OR Slim Jims, though I wish I did, because that is some good stuff, especially together. I still do not have my skinny man after lunch speed computer. You people are slacking!  
  
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So here's Sapphire, hopping merrily along with the Mellow Thick Toad, and Charcy, who is peeing on the Mellow Thick Toad every so often. But the Thick Toad doesn't care, he's mellow.  
  
Sapphire: CHARCY! You quit that!  
  
Charcy then runs off into a corn field  
  
Sapphire: CHARCY!  
  
She runs after Charcy and then loses the Mellow Thick Toad.  
  
Sapphire: Shoot! I ran after Charcy and lost the Mellow Thick Toad.  
  
I just SAID that, you baka.  
  
Sapphire: Oh, sorry!  
  
Like I was SAYING, before I was so rudely interrupted…Sapphire was running through the cornfield looking for Charcy and the Mellow Thick Toad when she came upon a scarecrow.  
  
Sapphire: Trowa? Trowa, is that you?  
  
Trowa: Yes, it's me…  
  
Sapphire: TROWA'S A SCARECROW!!! KAWAII!!! *Glomps him*  
  
Kao: Trowa's a Scarecrow?! Kawaii!! *runs through and glomps him.*  
  
Sapphire: Hey! My story!  
  
Kao: Oh, Gomen. Bye! *glomps Trowa one more time then runs away*  
  
Trowa: Yes, I'm a scarecrow…  
  
Sapphire: COOL! Okay, so have you seen the Mellow Thick Toad?  
  
Trowa: He went that way…or did he go that way? Or maybe that way?  
  
Sapphire: You don't know where he went do you?  
  
Trowa: What's a Mellow Thick Toad?  
  
Sapphire sighs with exasperation.  
  
Sapphire: I thought you don't talk much…  
  
Trowa: OH! That's smart Trowa…I'm Brainless Trowa!  
  
Sapphire: Brainless… Oh!  
  
She yanks the Scarecrow Trowa off the post  
  
Sapphire: Come on! We have to go see the Wizard of Odd! He'll give you a brain!  
  
Trowa: No he won't! He'll give me a diploma thus making me think I'm smart, thus making me smart, thus making the entire trip A COMPLETE WASTE OF TIME!  
  
Sapphire thwacks Trowa.  
  
Sapphire: Shut up, baka! Hey! I called Trowa a baka and thwacked him! Ooooh, I'm going to have to remember this because it isn't going to happen ever again!  
  
Trowa: Ooowww…  
  
Sapphire: So come on, let's go!  
  
Trowa: Why can't you just click your ruby red slippers together and go home?  
  
Sapphire: Because then I'll wake up and it'll be one in the morning and I won't be able to go back to sleep! Besides…I have diamond sneakers.  
  
Trowa: Whatever you say…  
  
Mellow Thick Toad: There you are, let's go.  
  
Charcy comes running up and Sapphire, Charcy, Scarecrow Trowa, and the Mellow Thick Toad all head towards Odd. On the way there, they pass through a forest filled with lots of Heathers. All the Heathers are holding Quatre plushies.  
  
Sapphire grabs one of the Quatre plushies from on one the Heathers.  
  
Sapphire: KAWAII!!  
  
Heather, #26: Hey! You think you can just walk right in here and start taking Quatre plushies?  
  
Sapphire: Hai?  
  
Heather, #14: Ne.  
  
Trowa: WE ARE THE KNIGHTS WHO SAY "NI!"  
  
Sapphire: Scarecrow Trowa, We're in a Wizard of Oz parody, NOT a Monty Python and the Quest for the Holy Grail parody. Though it would be interesting to see a parody of a parody.  
  
Trowa sings.  
  
Trowa: He is the brave Sir Robin, brave Sir Robin, br-  
  
Sapphire thwacks Trowa again.  
  
Sapphire: Man…this is weird, Trowa being baka, me getting to thwack him…I don't EVER wanna wake up!  
  
Heather, #7: ANYWAYS! You can't just come in here and start taking Quatre plushies! Get her, girls!  
  
All the Heathers start throwing Quatre plushies at Sapphire, Scarecrow Trowa, Charcy and the Mellow Thick Toad.  
  
Trowa: NOOO!!! COCONUTS!!  
  
Trowa runs off along with Charcy and the Mellow Thick Toad. Sapphire is going along picking up as many Quatre plushies and she can. Then she runs away following the others to Odd.  
  
~*~*~*~*~**~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Well, That's it for chapter 3! Tune in next time when we introduce Heero the Tin Man! Remember to Review! Hans? *Hans walks onto the screen. He takes a watermelon and squeezes it until it is the size of baseball* Remember, this could be you, so review! Hah, I made a rhyme. *She walks off laughing as Hans squeezes other fruits into smaller sizes* 


	4. Heero the Tin...er...Aluminum Man

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, The Wizard of Oz, or anyone besides Sapphire Skye. My trial against It's-Obvious-That-Isn't-A-Real-Name, Inc. is today. As I mentioned in the previous chapter, they are suing me for 6 jillion dollars for misuse of the name Sapphire Skye. I hope I win. Anyways, I also do not own Jell-o, because if I did, I would fill a swimming pool with it and have a party. One half of the Jell-o is for eating, while the other half is for swimming. I deleted a lot of files that I don't need, but my dad does. My computer is now as fast a medium weight man running up a steep hill wearing roller skates. Of course the speed is calculated by how many times he fell in an hour. Anyways, I'm rambling way too much so now… ACTION DAMN YOU ALL ACTION!  
  
(I'm sorry Kaosu…)  
  
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So here's Sapphire, Scarecrow Trowa, Charcy, and the Mellow Thick Toad are all walking along to Odd. They come upon another forest.  
  
Trowa: OH NO!! MORE HEATHERS! *dives into a bush*  
  
Sapphire: You baka, come here. *drags him out of the bushes*  
  
Trowa: Sorry…  
  
Sapphire sees a man dressed completely in aluminum foil.  
  
Sapphire: Hey! I see a man dressed completely in aluminum foil.  
  
I JUST said that, you baka.  
  
Sapphire: Oh, sorry!  
  
Sapphire walks up to the man dressed completely in aluminum foil.  
  
Sapphire: Heero? Heero, is that you?  
  
Heero: Yes, it's me…  
  
Sapphire: HEERO'S A TIN MAN!! KAWAII!!! *glomps Heero*  
  
Haruka: *Runs in* Heero's a Tin Man?! Kawaii!! *glomps Heero*  
  
Sapphire: Hey! My story!  
  
Haruka: Oh, Gomen. Bye! *glomps Heero one more time and runs out.*  
  
Heero: No, I'm NOT a Tin Man. I'm an Aluminum Man. We were out of tin, but we had a lot of aluminum foil.  
  
Haruka: *Pops head in* Heero's an Alumi-  
  
Sapphire: Haruka…my story.  
  
Haruka: Oh, Gomen. Bye! *Pops head back out*  
  
Sapphire: Wait, I thought you were supposed to not be able to move.  
  
Heero: That's a Tin Man, I'm an Aluminum Man. Leave myself vulnerable to attack? I think not.  
  
Sapphire: *shrugs, then gasps* HEERO WANTS A HEART!!!  
  
Haruka: *pops head in again* Heero wants… *sees Sapphire* Oh, Gomen.  
  
Heero: Hn…Your dream, not mine.  
  
Sapphire: That's okay. Trowa wants a brain.  
  
Trowa: How can you live without a heart, Heero?  
  
Sapphire: He's HEERO.  
  
Heero: How can you live without a brain?  
  
Trowa: Have you MET Duo?  
  
Heero: Good point.  
  
Sapphire: ANYWAYS! Come on, Scarecrow Trowa, Come on Tin…er…Aluminum Man Heero. We're off to see the Wizard!  
  
Trowa: The Wonderful Wizard of Odd!  
  
Heero: I swear, if you break into song, omae a koruso…  
  
Sapphire and Trowa: BECAUSE OF THE WONDERFUL THINGS HE DOES!  
  
Heero: I'm going to have to listen to this all the way?  
  
Sapphire: I want to be Japanese.  
  
Trowa: Where'd that come from?  
  
Sapphire: Heero.  
  
Heero: Me?  
  
Sapphire: *Shrugs* It'd be better than being a Texan…everyone thinks I have a horse and a big hat and an oil well in my backyard and that I've never heard of ice!!  
  
Trowa: Would you prefer being French where people think you don't bathe?  
  
Sapphire: Ew, no.  
  
Heero: I'm just going to follow this frog here.  
  
Mellow Thick Toad: *Jumps up and thwacks Heero* I'm a Toad, you baka!  
  
Sapphire: Aww…and I didn't have my camera.  
  
Trowa: Guess the Toad isn't so mellow, is he?  
  
Sapphire: And he can jump pretty high for being so thick.  
  
So off our group goes, Sapphire, Scarecrow Trowa, Aluminum Man Heero…  
  
Haruka: HEE-CHAN!! Wait for me!!  
  
Haruka is suddenly hit by lightning and disappears. God, I love being an Authoress. As I was saying, Sapphire, Scarecrow Trowa, Aluminum Man Heero, Charcy, and The Mellow-Until-You-Call-Him-A-Frog Thick Toad head towards Odd, yet again.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Authoress: Well, That's chapter 4. Stayed tuned for Chapter 5! Don't forget! Be a responsible reader and review! Because if you don't… *whistles* HANS! *A short, fat, very pale man walks up* Hey! You're not Hans!  
  
Friedrich: Well, you see…Hans ran off with my girlfriend Olga last night and well, he told me to tell you to take this job and…well, I don't feel like repeating it here. *whispers it in her ear*  
  
Authoress: He SAID that?! That's it, he's fired.  
  
Fred: I think he quit.  
  
Authoress: NOT THE POINT! Who am I going to get to threaten these nice people?  
  
Fred: We could always get my brother Nancy.  
  
Authoress: NANCY? Who's going to be scared of someone named… *a VERY tall muscular, very tan man walks up* Nancy?  
  
Nancy: Is this where I apply for the threatening job? *Nancy takes a piece of Carbon and squeezes it into a diamond*  
  
Authoress: *stares up at him then nods* Uh-huh…you got the job…  
  
Nancy: Good.  
  
Authoress: Well, uh, there you go, Read and Review or…I'm going to call you Butch from now on okay?  
  
Nancy/Butch: Alright  
  
Authoress: R&R or BUTCH will come after you! 


	5. Quatre says Meow!

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing or the Wizard of Oz. I also do not own anyone except Sapphire Skye. I had my trial today, and full rights of Sapphire Skye have been awarded to me when it was discovered that It's- Obvious-That's-Not-A-Real-Name, Inc. was discovered to not be real! Everyone cheer. Gooood. Now, On with the story!  
  
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So here's our group, Sapphire, Scarecrow Trowa, Aluminum Man Heero, Charcy and the Mellow-until-you-call-him-a-frog Thick Toad are traveling merrily along to Odd. They come to another forest.  
  
Trowa: Oh, no. How many forests can one place have? I mean, honestly! This is the third one!  
  
This forest is very dark.  
  
Sapphire: Wow! This forest is very dark.  
  
I JUST SAID that, you baka.  
  
Sapphire: Oh, sorry.  
  
Heero: This is idiotic. I'm an Aluminum Man, and I want a heart. What's next?  
  
He looks over at Sapphire and Trowa to find them huddled together, chanting.  
  
Sapphire and Trowa: Aries and Virgos and Leos, oh my! Aries and Virgos and Leos, oh my! Aries and Virgos-  
  
Heero: Guys?  
  
Sapphire: Yes, Aluminum Man Heero?  
  
Heero: Shut up.  
  
Sapphire: Okay!  
  
They walk in silence for a few moments until they hear a meow behind them. They all turn around and see a guy in a lion suit.  
  
Sapphire: Quatre? Quatre, is that you?  
  
Quatre: Yes, it's me. Why weren't you chanting? I was supposed to jump out and frighten you. But I didn't even hear you coming!  
  
Sapphire: QUATRE'S A LION!!! *glomps Quatre and doesn't let go.*  
  
Heero: I wouldn't LET them chant.  
  
Trowa: Heero ruins all our fun.  
  
Quatre: I…I can't…breathe.  
  
Heather: QUATRE'S A LION? *Runs in*  
  
Sapphire: MINE!!!  
  
Heather: Hmph… *walks off*  
  
Sapphire: Hehe…MY lion.  
  
Quatre: I can't breathe…  
  
Sapphire: Oh, sorry Q-kun! *lets go* Quatre wants courage!!  
  
Quatre: Yes, I suppose I do…  
  
Sapphire: Scarecrow Trowa, Aluminum Man Heero, Cowardly Lion Quatre…  
  
Trowa, Heero and Quatre: Yes, Dorothy-Sapphire?  
  
Sapphire: I AM NOT DOROTHY!!!!  
  
Trowa, Heero, and Quatre: Yes, Sapphire?  
  
Sapphire: Let's go to see the Wizard!!!  
  
Trowa: All right!  
  
So off they go, traveling and skipping and being merry little people.  
  
Heero: Not me.  
  
So off they go, traveling and skipping a being merry little people, except Heero.  
  
Heero: That's better.  
  
Eventually they all come to a rose field.  
  
Relena *from the sky*: Sleep, people…sleep!  
  
Everyone falls asleep landing on rose thorns.  
  
Relena: *looks down and sees Heero* HEERO!! Noooooo!!! I will wake them up!  
  
Demonika: *shoves Relena out of the way* Move over, sister. This is MY job.  
  
Demonika does some spells thingies and wakes them all up. All at once a loud scream is heard.  
  
Trowa: OW! OW! The THORNS!! The PAIN!  
  
Heero: You idiot, you're supposed to be made of straw, it shouldn't hurt you. You have no nerve endings. That's why it's stupid for you to get a brain. I'm not getting hurt because I'm covered in aluminum foil.  
  
Trowa: *blinks* These roses smell good.  
  
Heero: I give up.  
  
Quatre: Thorns…Thorns…oh…the thorns…OWWWWWWWWW!!!!  
  
Sapphire: Aww, Quatre, I'll kiss away the pain…  
  
Quatre: Ah…not right now…later…  
  
Sapphire: Okay!  
  
Everyone stands up, in pain, picking rose thorns out. They all look up so see a giant palace building thing all sorts of multicolors.  
  
Heero: How…odd.  
  
Sapphire: Yeah…odd…Odd? ODD!!!!  
  
She runs toward it.  
  
Sapphire: Come ON! It's Odd!  
  
The others looks around for a minute then started running after her. The Mellow Thick Toad turned into a Jell-o Stick Commode and the Chibi-Wufeis came and picked it up.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Well, that's it for Chapter 5! Don't forget to REVIEW! And come back for the next Strange chapter! Because if you don't…  
  
Butch: OH! Look at the pretty ROSES! *runs and picks the flowers*  
  
Sapphire: BUTCH!!! BUTCH!!! *sweatdrops* NANCY!  
  
Butch: *Looks at her* Oh sorry… *Goes back to turning carbon into diamonds*  
  
Sapphire: In the meantime… *grabs some diamonds* I'll be getting rich! *runs off yelling* DON'T FORGET TO REVIEWWWWWW!! 


	6. Zechs! The Wonderful Wizard of Odd!

Hey guys! Sorry it took so long for me to update, but I've been starting some new projects, including my newest ones, Wu Fei Chang, Miss USA, which is a comedy, and insane as well, and Sticks and Stones, which is a romantic comedy.of course.I'm not NEARLY as good with romance as I am with comedy, and insanity.but I promise it to be good, nevertheless. Thanks to everyone who's read and reviewed my stories. Hey you! Yeah, you, the one reading this, I want you to go and look at the review thing for all of my Gundam Wing stories and I want you to check out EVERY single author on there, and review every single story/poem/song ANYTHING they got.I don't care if they're writing about Moby Dick.You read and review.or I won't continue this.(and guys, I PROMISE I've read them, and when my schedule clears out a little bit, I'll go back and review them, kies? ^_^) They're just as hard- working as any of us and deserved to be read and reviewed as well! Now.I've got that out of the way.Time for me to start rambling.incessantly.about 4 people.and a dog.selfishly going out of their way to kill an innocent (*COUGH*) Witch.(*COUGH*) just so they can have what THEY want. Errrr.Anyways.On with the story!  
  
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Disclaimer: I do NOT own Gundam Wing or the Wizard of Oz (you know how some people don't have the patience to do this time after time after time? I'm starting to see why), or anyone besides Sapphire Skye. I also do not own.The Sims House Party, which you can send me for my birthday. (Sept. 14, remember that!) Um.I own a New Found Glory CD, Which I'm listening to right now, which.is skipping.for some insane reason.ANYWAYS! I'm starting to run out of ideas.so I'm hoping this thing will end soon.*thinks* I don't know.Anyone have any ideas for something else I could insanely parody with the G-boys, and possibly millions and million of Chibis? I'm lost for ideas.Takara, I'm still kind of waiting for my PICTURE.which I want you to put on a website so all these nice people can see it too. My sanity visited me the other day. My life's kinda going down the drain, and he came by to make me realize it even more.but I kicked him out! ^_^ Gah, okay my disclaimer's long.STORY TIME!!!  
  
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Our Gang, Sapphire, Scarecrow Trowa, Aluminum Man Heero, and Cowardly Lion Quatre and Charcy, now upset he had nothing to pee on starting, running towards Odd. After what seemed like forever, they finally reached the doors. They leaned on the walls as Trowa started gasping for air.  
  
Trowa: I'm.*pant pant*.so tired.*pant pant *.How long have we been running?  
  
Heero: Well the authoress said forever, but according to my watch.7 seconds.  
  
Trowa: *stops panting* Is that all? Okay then!  
  
Sapphire looks up at the building.  
  
Sapphire: I am looking up at the building.  
  
I JUST SAID THAT, you brainless baka!!!!  
  
Sapphire: Oh, sorry!  
  
*mutters* Why.WHY do I even bother?  
  
Sapphire: Hmmm.*pulls on a rope and a trap door opens up beneath all of them. They fall down a slide into what looks like a laundry room*  
  
Quatre: Where? Where are we?  
  
Someone dressed in brown, (we'll call him Bob) walks in.  
  
Bob: What are you doing here?  
  
Sapphire: I pulled the doorbell rope!  
  
Bob: AH! BAKAS! The rope's for laundry! The Big Button under the HUGE sign that says DOORBELL in bold letters is the doorbell!  
  
Sapphire: But there was no sign.  
  
Bob: Ohhhhh.Well that's a pig of a different weight.  
  
Trowa: ARE YOU CALLING ME FAT?! I CAN'T HELP IT THAT STRAW ABSORBS STUFF!!!  
  
Bob: Uhh.It's just a saying.  
  
Trowa: Oh! That's okay then.  
  
Sapphire: We need to see the wizard!  
  
Bob: All right his office is down the hall and 3rd door to the right.  
  
Quatre: What? No huge thing, with curtains and stuff so he can scare the living daylights out of us?  
  
Bob: Errr.no.  
  
So the group walks down the hall and to the 3rd door on the right. As soon as they open the door, Zechs jumps out.  
  
Zechs: BOO!  
  
Quatre: AHHHHHHHH!!!! *the poor thing runs away and leaps headfirst into a brick wall, leaving quite a nasty bump on his cute little head*  
  
Heero: Methinks I've discovered a preference in the authoress' opinion.  
  
SHUT UP! Can't you see I have a bishie to attend to?  
  
Trowa: I'm a bishie!  
  
Sapphire: *thwacks him* Shut up, Baka.  
  
Trowa: ITAI!  
  
Zechs: What the heck kinda word is Methinks?  
  
Heero: What the heck kinda name is Zechs?  
  
Zechs: Hmph.better than Millardo.  
  
Sapphire: Millardo?  
  
Zechs: Errrr.never mind  
  
Quatre walks back in with lipstick all over his face and bandages wrapped around his head.  
  
Quatre: I feel better now.  
  
Sapphire: HEY! Who's been kissing my Q-kun?  
  
I have! What you gonna do about it? *Lightning strike overhead.YES IN A BASEMENT!*  
  
Sapphire: Uhhh. *Turns to Zechs* We need to find the Wizard of Odd.  
  
Zechs: You're looking at him.  
  
Trowa: YOU? You're the Wizard?  
  
Zechs: Her dream, not mine.  
  
Trowa. Um, okay? I want a brain, Heero wants a heart, Quatre wants courage and Sapphire wants to go home!  
  
Zechs: Alright fine, I'll help, but you have to help me first.I've been getting some complaints about a witch or something.you got kill her and bring me back proof, a broom or a Poloroid or something, and I'll give you what you need.  
  
The group looks among each other.  
  
Heero: Ninmu Ryoukai  
  
Everyone looks at Heero.  
  
Heero: Shut up, let's just do this.  
  
So off our group goes, leaving Odd in search of Relena, to kill her for Zechs.O_o  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Authoress: Alright! That's chapter 6, or 5.you know, if you're not counting that introduction as a chapter.So, uh, R&R or.  
  
Butch: *staring dreamily at Zechs*  
  
Authoress: Aiyah! *smacks forehead* I knew there was something wrong with naming your son Nancy.  
  
Butch: Isn't she wonderful?  
  
Authoress: Listen Butch, we gotta ta.She? You.you think that.that blonde is a she?  
  
Butch: Of course.  
  
Authoress: Excuse me for a minute. *walks outside and has an extreme laughing fit. Comes back 5 minutes later still giggling, holding her stomach, and wiping away tears from laughing so hard.* Uh, yeah Butch.She's *stifles a giggle* just wonder.wonderful. Um, Read and Review or um.*bursts out laughing again* Ah, just read and review! 


	7. The Death of Relena

Disclaimer: Okie dokie! I own NOTHING besides Sapphire Skye and a kitten named Sammie, OR Quatre-Neko. Ermm.yeah.BTW.these little periods that just seem to interrupt everything.(don't periods ALWAYS interrupt stuff?) they're meant to be ellipses. You know, those three little dots? Anyways.FF.net.has screwed me over with them. I use then often. So I'm going to start making them like this . . . hehehe! ANYWAYS! Enough chitchat, I promised Quatre-Neko he could claw at my leg until I finished this chapter, as motivation, you see! ON WITH THE SHOW!!!  
  
A/N- All right, I seem to have been misunderstood. I am not a Relena Basher.she just happened to fit the part perfectly, and you know what? I may not make her die . . . eehh..Anyways! I'm sad to say that this will be the last chapter of the Wizard of Odd. *Cries* Yeah, I know. . . sad sad. BUT! I AM taking challenges! If you want to see a classic movie or something parodied, just come to me! Leave it on my review board! Don't forget to read my OTHER stories! I have other comedies out there, and some romance crap of whatever. Now..HERE WE GO!!!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Authoress: So our group goes running to go kill Relena, for Zechs. . . I'm so not going to get used to that. And eventually, the reach Relena's castle. They're standing on a ridge looking down at it in this valley. They see hundreds of Duos walking around like guards.  
  
Sapphire: I see hundreds of Duos walking around like guards.  
  
Authoress: *finally losing it* I JUST SAID THAT! ALL THROUGHOUT THIS ENTIRE STORY YOU HAVE REPEATED SOMETHING I SAID! I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME! WHY ARE YOU WASTING BREATH ON SOMETHING EVERYONE ALREADY KNOWS???  
  
Sapphire: Duo paid me to keep doing it.  
  
Authoress: *snaps head toward the Duos* He did, did he? *clears throat* All of the sudden the Duos were suddenly dressed in pink ballet outfits.  
  
Duos: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!  
  
Authoress: Duo, I have control over this story. *evil grin* Now, Just as suddenly the Duos went back to wearing all black.  
  
Duos: *scared stiff to say anything, in fear of having to wear pink ballet outfits again*  
  
Authoress: WELL? Get to chanting!!!  
  
Duos: Ye-yes Miss Authoress person, ma'am. OR-E-O! YOOO-PLAIT! OR-E-O YOOOO- PLAIT!  
  
Heero: He's chanting about Oreos and Yoplait. . .  
  
Trowa: Well, he IS Duo, despite the fact that there's tons of them.  
  
Heero: I suppose you're right.  
  
Leiko: *appears suddenly* Duo! Ssss! KAWAII!!! *glomps all of them*  
  
Sapphire: Leiko!!!  
  
Leiko: *bows* Gomen. *Glomps the last Duo and runs out*  
  
Quatre: All. . .right. Well how do we get past them?  
  
Sapphire: I have an idea. DUO! FREE BUFFET 20 MILES EAST OF HERE!  
  
Authoress: The crowd of Duos runs off to eat, and our group runs inside the castle. Heero however is stuck with the job of closing the gate, so the group is ahead of him by about 100 feet. They arrive in a large throne room.  
  
Relena: Hey! What are you doing here? Where's all my guards?  
  
Sapphire: Eating. NOW! We have to kill you so we can get our stuff.  
  
Relena: That's not very nice.  
  
Trowa: Yeah, but if I get a brain, Sapphire with stop thwacking me and calling me a baka.  
  
Sapphire: Shut up you baka! *thwacks him*  
  
Trowa: Ow. . .see what I mean?  
  
Relena: All right, now just how to you plan on killing me?  
  
Authoress: Heero walks in, having closed the gate and caught up with our group.  
  
Heero: Sorry I'm late, That gate's hard to mess with.  
  
Relena: HEERO!!! *starts running over to Heero*  
  
Heero: *pulls out a gun and shoots Relena*  
  
BOOM!  
  
Chibi-Wufeis: *pop in* Ding Dong, Relena's dead!  
  
Authoress: So Quatre takes a picture with a Poloroid camera, and then run back to Odd to see the Zechs, er. . . the Wizard. They run into his office and show him the Poloroid.  
  
Zechs: *looking at the picture* Relena. . .No. . . *he looks at the group* You killed my sister!  
  
Authoress: The group looks around for a few seconds confuzzled. Zechs and Relena were siblings?  
  
Sapphire: Yeah, well, you told us to!!  
  
Zechs: SO?!  
  
Heero: Just give us our stuff, damnit, before I shoot you too.  
  
Trowa: You better do it. He's trigger-happy.  
  
Zechs: All right, fine, fine. *Taps Trowa on the head* There you have a brain.  
  
Trowa: YES! No more bakaness!  
  
Sapphire: *mutters* baka. . .  
  
Zechs: *pokes Heero on the chest* There, a heart.  
  
Heero: I feel like writing poetry!  
  
Haruka: *pops her head in* Heero got a heart! Eep, Gomen. *pops head back out*  
  
Zechs: *kicks Quatre in the shins* There! Courage!  
  
Quatre: OW! That hurt!  
  
Sapphire: *rushes over to him and glomps him* Aww, my poor Q-kun!  
  
Authoress: Lightning suddenly strikes Sapphire.  
  
Sapphire: *coughs smoke*  
  
Authoress: MINE.  
  
Zechs: And you, Sister killer, I have to go home anyways, to make funeral preparations. I suppose I could drop you off.  
  
Sapphire: I get to go home!  
  
Authoress: So later that day Zechs is there with a shuttle. He's getting ready to take off when Charcy jumps out of shuttle door before it's closing. Sapphire runs after him, and Zechs closes the door and takes off. Sapphire runs back up.  
  
Sapphire: HEY! COME BACK!  
  
Zechs: I can't!  
  
Sapphire: Yes, you can! You're in a shuttle!  
  
Zechs: Oh yeah. . .WELL YOU KILLED MY SISTER!  
  
Sapphire: YOU TOLD ME TOO!!!  
  
Zechs: SO?! *Flies off*  
  
Demonika: *appears* Hey! Wait. . . Why didn't I get a scene where I yell Kawaii and glomp my bishie?  
  
Authoress: Because you changed fave Bishie from Duo to Trowa in the middle of the story. After Trowa, but before Duo. So too bad.  
  
Demonika: You are a cruel onna. All right, Sapphire, you ready to wake up?  
  
Sapphire: I guess. What time is it?  
  
Demonika: 9 AM.  
  
Sapphire: Seriously? Dang! I've been here too long. Okay lemme say goodbye. *hugs Trowa and Heero, and glomps Quatre* Bye guys!  
  
Demonika: Alright now just close your eyes, and click the diamond sneakers together three times, and say, "Wake up, you baka." Three times.  
  
Sapphire: *closes her eyes and clicks the sneakers together three times* Wake up, you baka. Wake up, you baka. Wake up you baka.  
  
Authoress: Suddenly Sapphire's eye flutter open and she finds herself in her bed with everyone staring at her.  
  
Sapphire: I just had a dream. And all of ya'll were there!  
  
Authoress: The G-boys and the girls look at her like she's insane, and Wufei mutters a "baka onna." The next night, everyone settled in front of the TV again.  
  
Sapphire: What are we watching this time?  
  
Demonika: Star Wars: Episode One.  
  
Sapphire: *stares at the TV screen. * Oh crap. . .  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Authoress: Well, That's it for Wizard of Odd. I hope you enjoyed it, Cuz I had fun writing it, and screwing with everyone. Now, Star Wars: Episode One. Is this foreshadowing of the next Gundam Wing Movie Parodies? Only Time shall tell. You Relena-basher got what you wanted. Relena died, and at the hands of Heero. THIS IS NOT A TREND! I like Relena, except when she causes Heero to get hurt because he's trying to protect her or whatever. . . The "Boom! Ding Dong, Relena's dead" Came from a VERY funny Fanfic I read, that I cannot remember the author or title to for the life of me. If you know please tell me, because I would like to Give them some acknowledgement, because that single line has inspired this whole story, and stories like it to follow. Erm. . .what else? Oh yeah!! I'm taking challenges, because I'd like to continue this series, but I can't do that if I don't have ideas of anything to parody. So, send Requests and Challenges! E-mail me at richkoch@wcnet.net or just post it on the review board. I read my review board over and over again, so believe me, it SHALL be noticed. Hmm, anything else? Questions (confuzzled?), comments (you want to tell me how great I am? hehe), and even flames (it lets me know I gets on peoples nerves) are greatly appreciated. So Read and Review! Because Butch here is on duty 24/7! Right Butch?  
  
Butch: My beautiful Goddess. . .flew away.  
  
Authoress: IT'S A GUY FOR PETE'S SAKE! HE JUST HAS LONG HAIR! ARE YOU BLIND? CAN YOU NOT SEE THAT HE IS A MAN? ARE YOU DEAF? CAN YU NOT HEAR THAT HE IS A MAN?  
  
Butch: *blushes, embarrassedly* I'm sorry. He really did look like a girl. What's wrong with you today? You're yelling at everyone.  
  
Authoress: People are lucky I could hold my temper that long.  
  
Butch: Oh. . .  
  
Authoress: Well, Read and Review, and be waiting for the Next Movie Parody in Gundam Wing Movie Parodies! (Which will be out when I actually WATCH Star Wars: Episode 1) Have Fun! 


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